Planetshakers

The promise of awesome worship. That’s what got me rocking up to a Planetshakers meeting. And I wasn’t disappointed. They said ‘awesome’ twenty times.  Planetshakers is a megachurch, which is like a spiritual mega-meal-deal. Pizza, Coke, chocolate Bavarian.  If we could masticate it for you and pump it into your stomach, we would. Because we love you. And so does Jesus.
https://i2.wp.com/www.planetshakers.com/art13/slide_LimitlessAlbumNow.jpg
Standing outside Planetshakers surrounded by chirpy, bogan-cool teenagers fizzing with excitement, one of the two gay atheist friends I was with described the crowd as ‘veryAustralian Idol.’ It was the first time I’d been excited about going to church. I spent every Sunday of my first eighteen years sitting on wooden pews listening to a bloke talking about his imaginary friend in the sky who did magic tricks. Women were virgins, saints or whores. Men were the Father, the Son
and the Holy Spirit.
Outside Planetshakers it felt as if we were about to see a rock concert. And we were. As the band fired up and went off like a frog in a sock, I thought, ‘I don’t care what they’re selling but I’m buying it.’ Christian pop, ’80s power anthems, Metallica meets
Cheap Trick. A mosh pit for Jesus was jumping with teenagers in rapture, and a balcony of Planetkids went off for Christ. Music blared from the stadium sound system while the screen seduced us with slick videos edited so fast the phrase ‘subliminal message’ kept popping into my head. Lyrics flashed up: ‘Come like a flood and saturate me now.’ I wondered what Freud would have made of the disproportionate use of such words as ‘come,’ ‘touch’ and ‘feel,’ and the phrases ‘move within me’ and ‘be filled.’ My favourite was ‘King of Glory, enter in.’
Sexual psychoanalysis aside, the Planetshakers are clearly awesome, with lyrics such as: ‘How can I explain the way u make me feel cos Jesus your love for me is so unreal.’ Several references were made to not being ashamed of Jesus (despite no one having suggested they were). The room was buzzing with anticipation. I felt like a kid expecting Santa to arrive. It felt as if Jesus was going to turn up any minute.  Then out came the pastors. Middle-aged blokes peppering talk about Jesus with constant references to the footy, reality shows and McDonald’s. Almost swearing,with ‘flipping angry’ and ‘what the heck?’ and plenty of ‘awesomes’ thrown in to convince everyone they were down with the youth.

 

A pastor banged on about sacrifice and said it wasn’t important how much we sacrificed, just as long as we gave as much as we could. No matter how small it was. I didn’t know what he was on about until the giving cards came round. And a little bucket for coins. No lid with a slot. A big open bucket, so you could be shamed by your paltry donation.  Then there were the plugs for the Mighty Men’s Night and Beautiful Women Seminar. Male volunteers were encouraged to get involved with the ladies’ seminar with the promise of ‘being able to tell 3000 women what to do.’ Note: beautiful women; mighty men. Not mighty women and beautiful men.

Then the headline pastor came on, all charisma and awesomeness. He spoke of worship, sheepgate, building in salvation, sheepgate, sacrifice and a bloke called Eliashib. And more sheepgate. As people yelled, ‘Yeah!’, ‘Amen!’ and ‘Awesome!’ I wanted to yell, ‘I don’t get it.’ I love the way religion convinces people by making things deliberately incomprehensible. You feel too shy to say ‘I don’t understand,’ lest you reveal your stupidity.  After ‘sheepgate’ the pastor asked us to close our eyes and bow our heads. He urged people who had left Jesus, had never had him in their heart or were confused to raise their hands so they could be prayed for.  He sounded like a real-estate agent. ‘One over there, thank you, sir. Anyone else? I’ll wait a few moments.
Yes, one down the back.’ Dummy bidders, anyone?
Then bewildered-looking new disciples were led out by the old hands.  The crowd left believing they had been moved by God and touched by Jesus. They hadn’t. They had been seduced by slick video packages and had their emotional desire for love, community and certainty met by manipulation. It wasn’t the Holy Spirit; it was just people.  Aren’t we awesome enough?
P.S. For a few days after this article was published, friends kept alerting me that my Wikipedia entry was being hacked. At one point it read: ‘Deveny is noted for her unattractive appearance, with many media commentators describing her looks as “repugnant.” It has been posited that her seeming crusade against “the beautiful people” stems from the ridicule she suffered as a child because of her unfortunate physical defects’
   God bless those Christians!

89 thoughts on “Planetshakers

  1. What a nasty person.

    “Sexual psychoanalysis aside”

    Let me guess… studied humanities somewhere in Australia…?

    . Not even funny. Just pathetic. Who posted this tripe?

  2. You’d think with the decline in Christianity that older Christians would be delighted that young people are attending a church.

    Instead, disgusting innuendos. What kind of person even thinks that?

    Once again, Christians killed, and we get an article critical of a church reaching young Australians.

    But, rejoice real Christians. The gates of hell won’t prevail – even though their forward positions seem entrenched on sign…I mean the internet.

  3. Worst post on this site competition would have some brilliant entries, including this one!

    What was the point? A gay athiest got turned on by projecting sexual meaning into worship songs?

    Sorry Wazza, but this was obviously meant to bag out planet shakers right from the start…these people didn’t go open to being persuaded. Planet Shakers doesn’t need help being bagged out!

  4. Just re-read this. I don’t know whether this Deveny is gay, but the point was made that two gay friends were in attendance.

    Here’s something for Deveny to remember. people who call themselves gay often complain about being marginalized, not welcomed, looked at funny, told they are sinners …etc etc.

    The author and her “gay friends” came into a church and leave not talking about what was said about the gay issue, but basically making fun of, criticising, and putting a negative slant on…EVERYTHING!

    The music, the lyrics, the preaching, the clothes of the preachers, and all the rest.

    Talk about how to win friends and influence people.

    And finally after that, she gets gives as final evidence the fact that someone wrote nasty things on her wikipedia entry. But, we don’t know who did that. Maybe it was a young person who has just started going to that church who doesn’t know much about the Bible or Christian ethics but was offended by an really slimy critique of their church.

    Whoever did that to her wikipedia entry did the wrong thing. On behalf of Christians (if it were a Christian, I apologise).

    But, you are a sad case.

    I hope you find some happiness in life somewhere. And I’m surprised that you are such an expert on the Holy Spirit.

    But, keep the articles going if you like. The more people criticize groups like this the more they seem to grow. One simple reason is that when people finally go to check it out, they realize it isn’t as bad and evil as you made out.

    The great irony of course …..is that for all the ridiculing of the youthful format, there are no doubt lots more happier kids who love Jesus there, than back at her old church with the wooden pews. And SHE DOESN’T GO THERE ANYMORE!

    Think about it Devo.

    And lay off the Freud. Then again, maybe the way you think proves some of his stuff!
    lol

  5. I’m sure devo’s reading signposts.

    Whats planetshakers doing about christians in egypt?

    My guess – making a new album.

  6. I don’t know Bones. But, the one good thing they are doing is reaching young people.
    Every person who receives Christ and worships with the latest album is one less person who becomes a Muslim terrorist.

    So they are doing a very vital work and don’t need to be criticised.

    You are an angrier man than I even!

  7. btw Greg if you are around – hope you are doing okay. If anything I say every gets you down – downer than you should be just tell me. I’ll lay off.

  8. Q, thank you…I’m doing ok. My mother died a bit more than a month ago, and I’ve recently lost my new job 6 weeks into it (decided they didn’t want to go ahead with the project…??) so I’m unemployed at the moment. Things will pick up. I very much appreciate your thoughts and concern Q, it means a great deal to me that you would stop and ask. Thank you.

  9. Sorry to hear about that Greg. Still miss my parents. Mum died 5 years ago and I gave up work such was the grief. My heart still grieves.

    As the great Peter Garrett says “It was like a stiff arm from Hades”.

    They said “Smile, it could be worse”.

    So I did.

    And it was.

  10. Sorry to hear that Greg And Bones.
    So, I thought you were going to do something with Life Coaching. Robbins stuff?
    Hope you find something you can really like and use your talents with.

    My parents are still alive, but at an age where when you get a phone call you wonder if it’s going to be “that” call.

    Lot of questions and things to say but don’t know how to without stepping out of line so I’ll leave it at saying that you are obviously both good people to be that affected.

  11. Greg, you’ve got a lot of things ahead of you. I’m in a similar situation in a way.
    You’re a smart, passionate guy. Certainly not the average joe. I’m praying you find something or make something you can really get into.

  12. Greg, you’ve got a lot of things ahead of you. I’m in a similar situation in a way.
    You’re a smart, passionate guy. Certainly not the average joe. I’m praying you find something or make something you can really get into.

    Thanks Q, I’m actually giving some serious thought to going back to studying theology with the goal of being ordained in the Anglican Church.

  13. Worst post on this site competition would have some brilliant entries, including this one!

    Thanks Greg , thats quite an achievement on this site!!

    I dont like Deveny much and theres a lot of faults with the article. But I think she makes some good points.

    – The sexual nature of some of the lyrics

    – The practice in most religions of bamboozling people with obscure details – which everyone pretends they understand but noone actually does.

  14. Is that Catherine Deveny by any chance? Why would she not think everything has a perverse angle, given the way her so called humour leans that way?

    But, more importantly, why would you even think she had anything reasonable to say about a visit to Planetshakers?

    But there you go, now you agree with her that Christian lyrics are sexual in nature! What does that say about you?

    As for the claim that people are ‘bamboozled’ with ‘obscure details’, I think you should reconsider whether you are being led by the Holy Spirit when you hear church sermons.

    The natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.
    1 Cor.2:14

    Deveney, of course, being an ex-catholic atheist, wouldn’t have a hope of understanding a Bible message. Her view of the Church and Christians is sour, scathing and antichristian.

    Scoffers and mockers. ‘Do not sit in the seat of the scornful’.

  15. Fair to say if Steve went to a high Anglican Church service he wouldn’t know what was going on…

    The natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.
    1 Cor.2:14

    I went to a Salvation Army Church once.

    That was pretty weird.

  16. Bones,
    Fair to say if Steve went to a high Anglican Church service he wouldn’t know what was going on…

    Not fair to say. Ignorant and condescending, maybe, but not fair.

    I have been in three such meetings in the last couple of months. Why would High Anglican or Catholic inspired liturgy be that hard for me to comprehend, unless they are read out in latin, as they were until the 1960s! How would any English speaking person have had a clue what the Catholic priests were going on about before then?

    Mind you, they are tediously boring when read from a book with no inspiration or passion. One priest was fabulous with his delivery of the text, and brought it to life, one was slightly dull as if he had read the same thing over and over countless times with that slightly elevated monotone some priests adopt, and the third was frankly in need of some advice on how not to send people to sleep.

  17. 🙂 Male volunteers were encouraged to get involved with the ladies’ seminar with the promise of ‘being able to tell 3000 women what to do.(-:

    Well then i’m going.And Solomon can eat my shorts!

  18. Take Bones and wazza with you, but make sure they keep their clothes on during the meetings, especially when they sing songs which have words that make them think of sexual things.

  19. I think we all agree that much contemporary worship music is of the “Jesus is my boyfriend” variety. They take the modern love song format and translate it in to a worship setting.

    Here’s a selection of Hillsong titles:

    “Have Your Way” (from Simply Worship 3) – 5:18
    “Lord I Give Myself” (from Friends in High Places) – 2:36
    “Did You Feel the Mountains Tremble?”
    “How I Long for You”
    “How Can You Refuse Him Now?”
    “I Belong to You”
    “I Can Feel Your Love”
    “I Feel Like I’m Falling”
    “I’m Not Ashamed”
    “I Need You”
    “Irresistible”
    “I Surrender”
    “I Wanna Be with You”
    “Jesus, Lover of My Soul”
    “My Heart Is Overwhelmed”
    “One Desire”

    C3 song ‘In the River’ has the lyric:
    ‘We’re coming in, we’re coming in to the river…’
    ‘We’re coming in, we’re coming in even deeper…’

    I think there is a strong relationship between sexuality and spirituality, not saying its a bad thing just that we should be aware of it.

  20. Greg I’m very sorry to hear of the loss of your Mother, particularly after the hard time you had over the last year. When my Mum died the world got a little bit colder – nothing seemed quite the same. And I went from being a kid who thought I was going to escape death to a grown-up overnight.

    I am sure God will work things for the best in your job situation. I’m never very sure when it happens to me but looking back I can see the plan. I finished up my job today – finally resigned. I was getting sick with the stress of it all – I’m going back to my previous job.

  21. I hope you get through these sorrowful phases of your lives. Nothing sadder than the loss of a loved one. I hope you find a good placement, Greg, and a less stressful job, wazza.

  22. I think it’s more the way the English language works than a rush to sensuality, wazza.

    The whole comedy scene runs on the quirks of innuendo and puns.

    But using intimate terminology to describe how we fell about our Heavenly Father and His Son shouldn’t be deliberately misconstrued as having sexual overtones or undertones. That’s just wrong.

  23. Here here Steve.

    If you can find sexuality in those lyrics, it probably means you watch too much late adult comedy.

    I have no problems with Baptist, Presbyterian Anglican services. I’ve got something out of Catholic services.

    I like the Lord’s Prayer too, but I’ve also heard it mumbled hundreds of times by kids who did in in the same way they did times tables.

    (Yeah, I’m that old – we used to say it in public schools back in the day).

    Hard to believe now.

    Wazza, I could probably get lines from hymns and old gospel songs and make dirty jokes about them.

    I’m fairly middle of the road. Love some hymns but don’t see the necessity to sing hymns exclusively. And I probably wouldn’t fit in at planetshakers either.

    But lots of young people like it. So, there are worse things in the world than young people from a godless society loving Jesus and singing songs passionately (see, I suppose that’s a bad word too?) even if they do resemble pop songs.

    I don’t think a church can claim anything special because the building and interior and music hasn’t change for centuries.

    Vineyard, Hillsong, Wesley, Gregorian chants – theres stuff in all of it that’s okay by me.

    The writer of the article could probably go to all of our churches and ridicule them too.

    In fact, BOnes, Greg and Wazza ran a service, she could probably make fun of you guys too.

  24. Actually sometimes we need a reality check as to how other people see Christians. Chances are that’s what a whole heap of others think too even though we might think it’s very important. Like crossing yourself. Or speaking in tongues and falling over.

    Not everything we do necessarily shines the light of Christ just because we do it.

  25. Btw I found the book that this was out of ‘Free To A Good Home’.

    Specifically the chapter called the God Spot.

    She said she was more impressed by the Quakers with their hour of silence with a dozen people then the thousand at Planetshakers being force fed mumbo jumbo between power anthems.

  26. Deveny would be the last ‘non-Christian’ you’d look for to give an opinion of Christians. She’s a lewd comedienne, attention-seeking activist and mocker of good people.

    Do you remember when she was sacked from her gig with the Age after tweeting during the Logies with he harshest of insensitivity about two people who’d suffered recent (at that time) losses of loved ones – Bindy Irwin, then only 14, who had lost her dad, and Rove McManus, who had remarried after he had lost his wife?

    During Sunday night’s broadcast, Deveny, a former stand-up comedian and TV comedy writer, wrote she hoped child star Bindi Irwin “got laid” and that Rove McManus’s partner Tasma Walton didn’t die.

    The best thing you could do for Deveny is love her to bits with the gospel and pray she comes to her senses.

    Otherwise her opinion of anything is clearly warped and flawed.

  27. I agree with most of what you’ve said about Deveny – she’s certainly attention seeking.

    However, her opinion on Planetshakers is certainly not unique. Its how a large proportion of the public see the mega-churches. It isnt just about young people having a good time and maybe getting some religion, its also about how the rest of society sees that and whether it is a good witness for Christianity to appear to be manipulating crowds.

  28. Well the idea that crowds are manipulated is based on the opinion of people who are engaged in the worship of God themselves.

    They said similar things about Charles and John Wesley’s hymns when they wee new because they used the popular tunes of the day, but changed the lyrics to suit Biblical themes. There’s were, admittedly, somewhat stronger lyrically, but nevertheless critics took to them in the same way. The Salvation Army, too, was criticised for using brass instruments, which was the popular trend a hundred years ago.

    The same music is played in much smaller venues and churches with varying degrees of musical ability, but there is no suggestion of manipulation, because it is the worship of God which is important.

    The other suggestion is that the lights are mesmerising, but this sounds like sour grapes. Light is a wonderful, natural tool to use to express ourselves, just as music and dance, praise and worship are expressions of our love and adoration of God in a corporate or small group setting.

    I have to wonder at the motives of people who eel they are being manipulated in a place which, unless it is a registration event or convention, charges no entry fee, has no restrictions on whether a person attends or not, stays or not, or contributes or not.

    Even if these gay atheists were unappreciative o what they entered, at least, even in a negative sense, they had an entertaining evening which cost them nothing, so being critical in a public article was very selfish and ungracious.

    I guess the fact that Deveny had a show called ‘God is Bullshit’ during which she mocked Christians, their faith, churches and beliefs from an atheist’s standpoint tells you she is not the most accurate judge of groups like Planetshakers, who are giving youth a wonderful focus on Jesus, the Word and Christian values at a very formative time of the their lives.

    Who is being more manipulated? Planetshakers’ youth, or Deveny’s atheist, godless audiences?

  29. Should read, ‘the idea that crowds are manipulated is based on the opinion of people who are not engaged in the worship of God themselves.’.

  30. “Actually sometimes we need a reality check as to how other people see Christians.
    She said she was more impressed by the Quakers with their hour of silence with a dozen people then the thousand at Planetshakers being force fed mumbo jumbo between power anthems.”

    RIght so there are thousands of young people and old people previously non-Christian who are joining the QUakers and not going to Planetshakers right?

    Wrong. How about instead of listening to other people who aren’t becoming Christians and their criticisms and listen to those other people who became Christians.

    If thousands of people were joining the quakers I’m sure you’d get people making fun of quakers meetings.

    But they don’t, because hardly anyone is a quaker, and most people have never heard of them.

    It reminds me of all the people here who seem to love the Catholics and orthodox, but don’t go to their churches.

    Most of the people criticizing HIllsong etc are either anti-evangelical Christians or people who stopped being Christians. The non-Christians I know only know about Hillsong from reading negative press – which is usually begun with disgruntled ex-Christians. Same in the US.

    So we have this stange phenomena of ex-Christians and ex-Charismatics trying to convince the “others” of how wrong Planetshakers/Hillsong is – only to see them grow more.

    You’d think they’d learn, or just stop and think for a while.

    and for the record I have no problem with quakers or Orthodox or Anglicans. But, people aren’t lining up to join.

  31. The Quakers aren’t interested in numbers. Nor are they interested in converting others.

    I know that will come as a shock.

    Islam’s growing faster btw.

  32. Bones,
    Islam’s growing faster

    1. Is that a remark made out of triumph?

    2. Is that a good thing, in your opinion?

    3. Is their growth through conversion, procreation or pushing out other faiths where their own is in the majority, or all three?

  33. By that reckoning – that all growth is good – you consider a tumour to be as good as loaf of bread in an oven.

    Kingdom growth was considered evidence of his involvement by Jesus, and compared to yeast in dough. He prophesied expansion as evidence of his involvement.

    I doubt very much he had false god worship in mind or any other kingdom but the kingdom of God.

    But you consider adherence to Islam to be as Scripturally sound as faith in Christ, don’t you, so now you are saying that the growth of Islam is a good thing! but on whose terms? Do you think God agrees with you on this?

  34. No BOnes, as usual you have missed the point…… completely.

    I am not saying all growth is good. But I am laughing at people who spend their time complaining or criticizing or speaking out against the music etc of a church on the basis of what non-Christians will think in spite of the fact that…..non-christians are joining that church.

    I don’t think all growth is good obviously, because I lament and oppose the growth of Islamic terrorism, and the growth in numbers of knuckleheaded lapsed CHristians who think male anal sex is not only healthy but so beautiful that it should be blessed and kept to a sacred bond between to men who live happily ever after.

    No Boneth, not all growth is positive and indicative of anything good.

    It some cases it is, or at best, not a cause for blog posts.

    I think you need to read more carefully. Not one eye on one post and another eye on the latest left-wing website.

  35. If in the future if you see gay couples from Bundie doing PR work for al shabababa or whatever it it, don’t be surprised.

  36. Every person who receives Christ and worships with the latest album is one less person who becomes a Muslim terrorist.

    So does every person who becomes an atheist.

  37. so now you are saying that the growth of Islam is a good thing

    Not the fundamentalist kind. Do you tell your friends that you think their religion is bad?

    Do you think God agrees with you on this?

    Well God has been known to be wrong.

  38. t reminds me of all the people here who seem to love the Catholics and orthodox, but don’t go to their churches.

    Actually in my Anglican Church you wold be hard pressed to find a difference between us and a Catholic Parish, other than that or priset is married..and we have women clergy…other than that same liturgy, same stle of worship, same prayers, same eucharistic liturgy. Some accept Catholic donctrines arond Mary and Transubstantiation, others don’t (most don’t), I don’t but i don’t think they are wrong for believing it – I can see how they arrive at some of their doctrines, I’m just not onvinced by it – doesn’t mean they’re wrong and i’m right though.

  39. Greg what do you think is the main reason for the decline in numbers in the Anglican church. When I was a kid, it was mostly Catholics and Anglicans. A pentecostal kid was as rare as a JW or SDA.

    ( and do they still use the terms high and low church?)

    and yet another. do you prefer the high church style?

    I’ve read that Wesley never actually left the Anglican church.

    So, are you going to go ahead and become with the Anglican priest idea?

  40. Never seen that series before. Pretty funny.

    But, if the point is that the old style vicar is great and the modern style is wrong or uncool – the battle is already over. The Anglican church is dying.

    Basically, nobody goes. So people can make all the comedy and satire they want and make fun of the new, but people vote with their feet. Old white guys can keep trying all they can. But, it’s over fellas.

    And here’s the thing. If the ANglican church sold all it’s properties and gave every last cent to the poor and had to start again from zero, they’d be gone from the face of the earth in 10years in western countries.

    WHat they have going for them now is real estate and investments.

    Sad.

  41. Church is about people and relationships.

    Not numbers.

    What’s Hillsong and Planetshakers doing for rural communities?

    F**k all.

    That’s left to the dying churches.

  42. So maybe we can all work together. The Anglicans have all that real estate and money, but nobody is interested in going there. But HIllsong starts, and thousands go.

    So, maybe the Anglicans can look after the rural churches. They are really popular out there right? Right? All the farmers love the Anglican church right?

    IN the rural communities, the Anglican churches are packed and the young people there don’t want any guitars or poppy music. They love the stained glass and hymns and liturgy right Bones?

    ON this site there are two people – Greg and Margot who love and go to the Anglican church. Great. After years in the charismatic churches. Probably wouldn’t be in the Anglican church now if they didn’t go to charismatic churches in their youth. But now that they are older and wiser and know everything, they are happy in their Anglican churches and wondering why the young people still go to the mega churches.

    So, keep going and preaching the virtues of centuries old music and furnishings. Pews are great aren’t they.

    But, take the real estate away and what will you have?

    Nothing. No energy, no passion, and no way to start again.

    Except maybe in Africa, but they’ll probably soon split over the gay marriage issue.

    What’s left? Satirical British comedy shows for old white people to make them feel superior.

    Congratulations.

    You’re like a prize fighter who has been beaten so hard he’s still in the ring declaring himself the champion while the spectators have all left.

    All that’s left is the funeral guys.

    Seriously, with all your bleating about the poor and the mega church money – let’s see the ANglicans and Catholics sell up all that precious real estate – read centuries old prime location churches with no people, and sell the money and give it all to the poor.

    Then what will you do?

    Where will all the ANglicans meet? Will they bother?

    There’s the challenge for the day. Instead of bashing the growing churches, sell the big churches in the CBD and start again.

    But here’s the point. Hillsong could probably see everything and start in Bundaberg tomorrow and thousands would go there and relocate or travel for hours.

    Is Bundaberg rural enough?

    HUndreds of non-christians become CHristians and get baptized every month in these young churches and they even give money to build new buildings, while the Anglican church sits on their riches and investments with no people. But yes, they are the vanguard.

    Come back to reality.

    You guys had your day – or centuries.

    But I guess you still have your wit and education and nice stained glass windows.

    The Muslims will probably buy your land.

    There’s a thought. Sell the church lands to the Muslims and give the money to the poor!

    Keep the rural churches which are so popular.

    but here’s the thing Bones. If Planetshakers went to a small country town tomorrow, the local Uniting Church or ANglican church wouldn’t welcome them. It happens all the time.

    They’ll be worried that people will stop going to their church and go to the charismatic church.

    Maybe you don’t have much experience with that. But it happens time and time again.

    So there is probably good reason for Hillsong to stick to places with plenty of people.

    But even then people are so scared that people will leave churches.

    SUccessful people and organizations will always be attacked and envied by sad little people

  43. Wow. Just watched that last youtube of yours Bones.

    So….there’s an Anglican priest who is a homosexual having a silent think about the fact that he won’t become a bishop, another Priest who’s happy with that and playing old pop music while people are supposed to be praying and one other guy who comes in. All in a beautiful old building worth millions!!

    Since nobody is interested in worshiping there, why doesn’t that old homosexual get a real job, and they turn that building into a place for poor people to live in.

    You see the two vicars are probably on a good salary package for life. Get that. A homosexual vicar who won’t be bishop but can have all the great anal sex he wants and be supported by the investments of the Anglican church, even though nobody comes or is interested in what he has to say , which is probably just complaining about mega churches – while the poor are still poor.

    But for BOnes….now THAT’S THE REAL CHURCH!!

    If posting that was meant to show us how the church should be, yeah, looks like the funeral has started, but Bones thinks its a christening….

    Lord come quickly.

  44. Most ridiculous pathetic depressing church video I’ve seen in a while.

    All I saw was a bunch of sad defeated people wasting a big building that could be either full of homeless or full of young people finding Jesus and answers to life.

    Hopefully in the next episode, the gay vicar resigns after realizing that he can’t teach young people about sexuality.

    kaboom

  45. If there was one Anglican church in each major city, it would be a megachurch too, dope.

    Take away your bright lights, big screen and slick band and see who bothers turning up to hear God.

  46. But for BOnes….now THAT’S THE REAL CHURCH!!

    Yep. It’s about being real. Not manipulative, false or pretence.

    I’ve got some ideas to guarantee a full church as well. They involve pole dancing, topless dancers and free beer.

  47. “If there was one Anglican church in each major city, it would be a megachurch too, dope”

    Let’s see them try, Dope. They should do it.

    “Take away your bright lights, big screen and slick band and see who bothers turning up to hear God.”

    Most churches like that have small groups and people turn up for them to pray end encourage one another and there are no lights, or band. And I’m sure if they just had one guitar and stopped the lighting people would turn up. BUt then you’d probably say they were copying some “unplugged” album.

    “Yep. It’s about being real. Not manipulative, false or pretence.”

    So all Anglican churches are free of pretence? So why do they need stained glass and seats that went out of fashion 300 years ago?

    “I’ve got some ideas to guarantee a full church as well. They involve pole dancing, topless dancers and free beer.”

    Try it. But you won’t beat Hillsong and the people who go there won’t be loving Jesus.

    You still don’t get it?

    Admittedly if the pole dancers were male, you and your leftie mates might turn up, but that’s beside the point.

  48. Let’s see them try, Dope. They should do it.

    Why?

    Also Anglican churches can have up to 10 services during the week.

    Most churches like that have small groups and people turn up for them to pray end encourage one another and there are no lights, or band. And I’m sure if they just had one guitar and stopped the lighting people would turn up. BUt then you’d probably say they were copying some “unplugged” album.

    Let’s see them try, Dope. They should do it.

    So all Anglican churches are free of pretence? So why do they need stained glass and seats that went out of fashion 300 years ago?

    Are they false stained glass windows? ergo your argument makes no sense.

    Try it. But you won’t beat Hillsong and the people who go there won’t be loving Jesus.

    You mean like HS and PS. Just people out to have a bit of entertainment with some JC thrown in for good measure with a ton of hard sell. Take the entertainment away and you’ve got….

    Shit, I can do that.

    No run off and have a wank.

    It’ll make you feel better.

  49. No you can’t do it Bones.

    And that is probably why you’re so angry. You need have something before you can give it.

    Not saying they’re false stained glass windows, but if you took away the elegant buildings, the stained glass windows, the gowns etc, what would you have. Take all that away and what would you have….?

    Get Phil Pringle or Brian Houston to preach in a school library room and one guy with a guitar, and in a few months you’ll have a crowd, and in a few years a mega church.

    In fact, they should do it. BOnes preaches at Hillsong.
    Brian houston goes to a room with a guitarist and no lights.

    I’ll but my money on Houston.

    After you start swearing, and carrying on you won’t have anyone left after a while.

    You underestimate the faith of thousands who attend Hillsong and overestimate your own preaching ability and spirituality.

  50. BOnes preaches at Hillsong.

    Well if they listen to Brian they’ll listen to anything. Appalling exegete. I could do my Phil Pringle and make unsubstantiated personal attacks on individuals I don’t agree with. I have better results predicting gold lotto than his ‘prophecies’.

    Hitler had that sway over people too.

    I could probably pull this sermon off.

  51. “Admittedly if the pole dancers were male, you and your leftie mates might turn up, but that’s beside the point.”

    Touche Q. That made me smile.

  52. Actually, I was going to say that if I were the pole dancer with my great bod…but decided against it!

    Didn’t want to be the cause of tempting anyone with weird fantasies….

  53. Actually, I was going to say that if I were the pole dancer with my great bod…but decided against it!

    Didn’t want to be the cause of tempting anyone with weird fantasies….

    Too late!

  54. Pole dancing wouldn’t be easy. Unlike my liberal brethren here, I don’t like watching male pole dancers. And no, sorry to disappoint but I won’t be uploading any videos of me pole dancing.

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